A simple 7-step guided thinking exercise for when your heart is saying one thing, your brain is saying another, and you need to know what to do next.
Get The Two-Voice Method — $7 →If you love her but have no idea what you actually want, you already know how exhausting this can get.
Your heart says one thing. Your brain says something completely different.
So you replay the same questions. You imagine ten different futures. You change your mind. Then change it back.
I know the feeling because I recently needed clarity in my own relationship. I wanted to figure out what I actually wanted before I had to say anything out loud.
That is why I put together The Two-Voice Method.
It's a 7-step thinking exercise designed to get your thoughts and emotions working together instead of pulling you in opposite directions.
The process is inspired in part by Cal Newport's concept of productive meditation: instead of trying to empty your mind, you deliberately use focused thought to work through one important problem.
In this case, that problem is simple: What do I actually want from this relationship — and how do I ask for it?
When you stop dodging what you actually feel, decisions you've been avoiding can suddenly become harder to ignore.
Emotions you didn't realize were that strong may come up. And you may see your relationship differently on the other side of the exercise.
This isn't meant as hype. It's simply a reason to approach the exercise seriously.
If you're in a fragile emotional place right now, take that seriously. Don't force the exercise. Use it with real intention, and seek appropriate support if you need it.
My hope is that you try The Two-Voice Method, get something genuinely useful from it, and decide you want more from Notes on Love.
But even if this is the only thing you ever buy from me, it may help you look at your relationship with a level of clarity you've been missing.